Cloistered

I've been feeling really squeezed for time lately and I feel myself pulled in too many directions. The sole focus of this situation is my part-time job that I work on the weekends. The job itself is really fine; its a job like many others out there that promises you more money than you actually get and is frustrating and beneath you, but the money is good enough to keep you there. Specifically what is bothering me is the opportunity cost I have to pay to continue that job.

If you're unfamiliar with the term "opportunity cost" it's an economic term that basically means you have to pay something for every action. It doesn't have to be money, it could be labor or time, but you sacrifice one of those three commodities for just about every action or decision you make. I'm not going to get into a huge, boring discussion about that, if you want to learn more about it, you can go here. What I find myself using as currency more and more is time.

This became more clear this weekend when I had to bow out of helping do some yard work around my step-parent's house. In the scheme of things it wasn't a big deal, it was just fixing and putting up a fence, even though I spent Friday evening helping out as best I could. My brothers took care of everything the next morning, but I was hurt that I couldn't be there with them.

For those of you that don't know, my step-parents are in their 60's and 70's and my step dad, Big Lou, is not in good health any more. Physical activities are really too much for him these days, so maintaining the upkeep and repairs of a house is really too much for him. This was evident when I got to their house on Friday and it was being overrun with weeds, many of which had become small trees. I immediately felt bad about not having come down there more often and taken care of these things.

Between them, my own mother, Meva's mother, and my wife and kids, I am paying an awful lot to keep that job on the weekends. It makes me feel cut off from everyone and quite useless if I can be honest.